I've been meaning to post this for awhile now. It's highly entertaining. I was asked to do a writeup about myself for our company newsletter since I was moving to Bentonville to establish an office for our company. I really don't like writing about myself in order to market me, so I requested my ever so kind boss, Brad, and BFF, Rachel, to take on the task. Given their extremely competitive natures, they decided to make a competition out of it. Below is the winning piece:
As part of our upcoming RW3 Wal-Mart initiative for 2007, we will be transitioning Jenny Lorenzo, a Senior InSight Group Business Analyst, to a new position. Jenny has been with the InSight Group for over two years including roles as Report Analyst, Design Engineer and Business Analyst. Ms. Lorenzo has spent much of your RW3 career as the Lead Analyst for the Nestle Foods account. Jenny’s new title will be Strategic Business Analyst for the InSight Group.
Jenny will be relocating to Bentonville, AR in the first quarter of the year. She will be establishing a key presence for RW3 in the CPG industry centered around the Wal-Mart base of operations. Jenny will be able to provide onsite consulting and analysis with both current and new clients in the area.
Jenny is a highly qualified RW3 resource and has earned both a Bachelor’s Degree and Master’s Degree in Information Technology. Combining her vast education with her close working relationships with CPG clients has allowed Jenny to excel in her many roles with the InSight Team.
Ms. Lorenzo enjoys singing, reading and creative writing. Her new CD entitled “Nestle Nights” will be out in March. Jenny hopes to stop using Crack in 2007 and wants to find two men to be her submissive slaves. Jenny can be reached on her website, www.jennyisthebestpersonintheworld.com. Jenny’s fondest memory is framing her best friend into going to jail when she actually robbed the church. Her favorite saying is “F-YOU, Bitch”. We are so excited for her to get the hell out of Austin.
I hope you enjoyed that as much as I did ;) You can find the edited and published version here.
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